The amount of vitriol, crassness and even vulgarity in the public discourse is stunning.  We see it in politics.  We see it with simple news posts on social media.  We see it with the lack of loyalty and haste to discard and even demonize college coaches when they are not winning.  20 years ago, you had to turn on Saturday morning wrestling or tune into Jerry Springer to see this kind of behavior.  It has since expanded into many other reaches of life, for entertainment and political purposes.  No one in real life actually acted like that.  Back then, if we happened to stumbled onto a channel with Jerry Springer, we would say, “Where do they find these people?”  Today, if I click on virtually any news post on Social Media, it is like I turned on the lights in a cockroach infested kitchen.  They are everywhere, and I like it about as much as I would like a roach-infested kitchen.

As much as I hate seeing what already exists in the form of bad thinking and horrific attitudes, it scares me to think about the way this negativity is reinforcing these attitudes and ways of thinking among children and adults in our society and those around the world for generations to come.  So, I want to start taking small steps to begin influencing people in a different direction.

Many years ago, a gentleman sent me a message, which he closed with “With Care and Respect”. I liked it so much, and found it so counter our current cultural trend toward negativity, I adopted it, often using it to close my own messages. Encapsulated within this short phrase are the key elements that seem to be increasingly missing in social media-based modern society, “Care” and “Respect”. 

Our quarterback did not perform well this weekend, so let’s slaughter him on social media.  I see this in the pros, in college football and even down at the High School level, sometimes.  Let’s say, “NO” to the slaughter, and, instead, let’s treat him and the team with care and respect.  Let’s let the coaches figure out what happened.  And, within the quarterback’s psychological framework of what works best for him, let’s let them work with him, so that next week, he will perform better.

Let’s voice our political differences without snatching someone’s hat off their head.  Let’s stop making Facebook, ShoutBook, where we, too often, respond to political posts that are designed to anger, with our own angry post.  I am not naive enough to think we could just stop posting political posts on Facebook, at all.  But, responding, if you must, thoughtfully, is much more appreciated.  Even if the other person responds in anger, we control our own selves.  We are not required to respond in kind.  I like to tell my children to drive their own car and let other people drive their car.  We don’t blow the horn just because someone is taking longer at an intersection than we prefer.  And, we don’t respond to other people blowing their horn at us.  That’s called self-control and discipline.

Now, a good way to continuously remind people of these ideas is to sign off our messages, especially emails, “With Care and Respect”.  That’s going to be our tag, and ongoing reminder to be an example of this ethos and to share it with others.